People seeing you as the same as them
This is the biggest, without this none of the rest works.
People want to know people like themselves.
Doctors offended with doctors, mafia people are friendly with mafia people and so on.
They are not necessarily friendly with the best person, it’s the person that they relate to most.
People feel comfortable and can relax with people like themselves and feel very uncomfortable with people who are different.
They tolerate people who are different, it doesn’t mean that they want to be with them.
So you have to show people the side of yourself that is like them and also adapt so people think you are like them.
If you are a bit posh and you’re talking to a builder, you’re going to have to behave a bit more like a builder.
When you finish the social interaction though, remember who you are so you go back to yourself and don’t get lost in this.
Being likeable
Love people, don’t hate them.
Love it the thing that connects people.
Hate is what cuts people apart from other people.
Loving people will make you warm, comfortable to be around and stop people being scarred of being socially rejected by you.
It will mean you make good eye contact and smile nicely at people
If you love other people, they will love you and it makes you loveable.
People who are full of hate are not lovable.
Love other people, don’t hate them.
This has to be real, you have to feel it, you have to care, you can’t superficially fake it. The reality and truth is what makes it happen under the surface and in reality. So yes, you actually have to love people, which is hard.
Focus on other people’s needs.
The first thing with social skills is to focus on the needs, welfare and wants of other people.
This means you can realise and be aware of what other people want and provide it.
If a person is just thinking about themselves and what they get, they will be in their own ego, just on themselves and oblivious to what other people want. As a result they will not get results.
In fact with this selfishness it can only happen that the person displays what they themselves want and so will repel others.
Companionship
People are social animals, they like to be with other people.
This means that they want to be with other people on a physical, psychological, spiritual and divine level.
They are happy with other people.
Sad with other people.
Party with other people.
Doing something with others makes something bigger.
To achieve this needs a person to empathise with others.
If things are going well for you, people want to be part of what you are having
If you are happy, well and things are going well for you then people would like to be part of what you are having.
So if you are a person who is happy, things are going well for you and are having fun. People want to be part of that.
People will be drawn to you and want to be part of your life.
Make people feel good about themselves
People want to be with people who make them feel good about themselves. For example, that they are a good person, intelligent, talented, good looking, etc.
The person who listens to them, appreciates them and lets them talk.
If you’re telling people that they are incorrect, criticising them and so on, then people feel less good about themselves.
If you are also feeling good, such as being relaxed and happy, then people will also feel good about themselves from being around you. It just comes over.
Notice people
Notice people, ask who they are, notice what they do. It must be genuine and not manipulative.
When you talk to people, it is about them, your focus is on them and what is best for them.
People will do anything for you, if you do that.
People don’t say like attention and to be genuinely listened to. Genuinely listen to what they are saying, not just fake it.
Good energies
If you are full of good energies then people want to be near you.
If you have negative energy such as stress, anxiety, worry, fear and so on, then people won’t want to be near you.
To be full of good energies, love other people, care about other people, think about other people. Think about the needs and welfare of others.
Then you will like the sun that radiates light as that is what it is.
If you are just thinking about yourself, you’ll just be full of darkness, like a black hole just sucking things in. People don’t want to be near that kind of thing.
Free from concern
Jim Carrey said this was the breakthrough that made him a successful comedian, he discovered that people want to be free from concern.
So he became the person on stage that was free from concern.
When you are with people, they don’t want your problems.
Be the person where everything is okay, you are not worried about things and so on.
However, you have to balance this with being real or there is nothing for people to relate to you with.
Lifetime Wisdom 